Helping someone who's stressed

It can feel difficult if someone you're close to is feeling stressed.

You might find it hard if you can't help them change the situation that's causing them stress. But there are still lots of practical things you can do to help.

My friends, family and colleagues clocked that something was up without me having to say much at all, and gave me the push I needed to get some help.

Help them notice signs and symptoms of stress

Often, someone might not notice that how they feel or behave is a sign or symptom of stress. For example, this may include having problems sleeping, or drinking more alcohol than usual.

You may be able to see these signs in someone else. This could even be before they recognise it themselves.

If you've noticed this, you could let them know and ask how you can help. Try to be gentle when starting this conversation. It might not be something they're aware of. Or they might feel sensitive about it.

Help identify their triggers

It may help to talk about things you've noticed that might trigger their stress. But remember that they might also find this conversation stressful. Try to stay open-minded and avoid judging them. Being patient can also help.

Listen to how they feel

Having a chance to talk could help them feel calmer and more able to deal with their stress. Being there for them and listening without judging them can help.

Reassure them

When someone is in the middle of a stressful time, it can be hard to see when it might end. Let them know that situations change and can get better.

Help them to relax

You could help them research relaxation techniques and find ways to practise them. For example, this could be a weekly yoga class, or setting aside time for breathing exercises at home. This might become something that you could do together.

There's some ideas on our relaxation page. 

Help with causes of stress

There are many situations or experiences that can cause stress. You might be able to help them look for support for some of these issues. For example, this could be help with debt, housing problems or difficulties at work.

Our tips for everyday living might be a place to start. It has pages on housing, money, parenting, racism and more.

Support them to seek help

You could help them contact their GP, or go with them to an appointment. Or you could help them to do some research on mental health and wellbeing.

Our page on helping someone else seek help has more ideas.

Look after yourself

If someone around you is very stressed, you might feel stressed too. If this happens, try to take a step back. Look after your own wellbeing. Having good wellbeing can make you feel more able to help someone else.

Our page how to improve your mental wellbeing has tips to help you.