Self-harm

Explains self-harm, including possible causes and how you can access treatment and support. Includes tips for helping yourself, and guidance for friends and family.

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What is self-harm?

Self-harm is when you hurt yourself as a way of dealing with very difficult feelings, painful memories or overwhelming situations and experiences. Some people have described self-harm as a way to:

express something that is hard to put into words
turn invisible thoughts or feelings into something visible
change emotional pain into physical pain
reduce overwhelming emotional feelings or thoughts
have a sense of being in control
escape traumatic memories
have something in life that they can rely on
punish yourself for your feelings and experiences
stop feeling numb, disconnected or dissociated (see dissociative disorders)
create a reason to physically care for themselves
express suicidal feelings and thoughts without taking their own life.

After self-harming you may feel a short-term sense of release, but the cause of your distress is unlikely to have gone away. Self-harm can also bring up very difficult emotions and could make you feel worse.

Even though there are always reasons underneath someone hurting themselves, it is important to know that self-harm does carry risks. Once you have started to depend on self-harm, it can take a long time to stop.

"Self-harm proved to me I was real, I was alive. At times it also silenced the chaos in my head, briefly pausing the repetitive flashbacks and body memories."

Talking about self-harm

Watch Ben, Lechelle, Debbie and Zainab talk about the reasons behind their self-harm, the different ways they have learned to cope and how they think friends and family could have supported them.

How do people self-harm?

There are lots of different forms of self-harming. Some people use the same one all the time, other people hurt themselves in different ways at different times.

Warning: it can be upsetting and potentially triggering to read information about how to self-harm. If you are feeling vulnerable at the moment, you might not want to read the information below.

Ways of self-harming

Ways of self-harming can include:

cutting yourself
poisoning yourself
over-eating or under-eating
biting yourself
picking or scratching at your skin
burning your skin
inserting objects into your body
hitting yourself or walls
overdosing
exercising excessively
pulling your hair
getting into fights where you know you will get hurt.

If you self-harm, it is important that you know how to look after your injuries and that you have access to the first aid equipment you need. Lifesigns has information on first aid for self-injury and self-harm.

If you’re concerned about an injury or not sure how to look after it, go and see your GP.

"I think one of my biggest barriers to getting help was actually not admitting to myself that I had a problem. I used to tell myself, 'I’m only scratching, it’s not real self-harm.'"