The horror of living with the Holocaust
On Holocaust Memorial Day, Joanna Hahessy blogs about how the trauma experienced by survivors can be passed down the generations and how they can be helped.
Intergenerational trauma, also known as transgenerational trauma, is where one generation passes on trauma to the next generation. Trauma can be any distressing or threatening event or series of events that overwhelms a person’s ability to cope. Among the examples of life events that may be experienced as trauma are war and combat, racial trauma and traumatic bereavement, all of which may have been experienced by the children of Holocaust survivors.
“Some Holocaust survivors may have struggled to parent effectively because of their own trauma and poor mental health.”
I’ve got my own history of trauma so I can relate to the traumatic experience of others. I use what happened to me to help others. Some of the people I work with, who have depression, anxiety, mistrust, low self-esteem, PTSD, anger, hypervigilance or use negative coping strategies, such as alcohol and drugs, turn out to have a parent or grandparent who was a Holocaust survivor. I’ve had cases where both parents have been survivors and some where it’s just been one parent, but it’s more typically both parents. Yet they often don’t disclose this because they don’t think it’s relevant.
The impact of what happened to people during the Holocaust can trickle down through the family. Some Holocaust survivors may have struggled to parent effectively because of their own trauma and poor mental health, affecting their children and subsequently their grandchildren, in various ways.
“Clients have said they weren’t able to raise their own mental health issues to their parents, knowing how much their parents had gone through.”
One of my clients, who is a second-generation Holocaust survivor, had trouble expressing their feelings because they didn’t feel they were listened to, accepted or valued as they were growing up. They had a lot of anger around this, so together we worked on coping strategies around managing this anger.
Other clients have said they weren’t able to raise their own mental health issues or concerns to their parents, knowing how much their parents had gone through during the Holocaust. Comparing their own issues to the experiences of their parents had left them carrying a lot of guilt.
I have also found that there can be issues around attachment for Holocaust survivors. Some may have strong attachment issues, which make them overprotective towards their children. Others may have anxious attachment and will avoid getting too close to their child for fear that they may be taken away from them. One of the people I worked with said that there was a lack of attachment between them and their parents and, as a result, they grew up very insecure and vulnerable themselves.
“When they are feeling depressed, they can turn to the toolbox, which helps to ground them and take them to a better place.”
The children of Holocaust survivors can also grow up in an unsuitable living environment because of their parents’ hoarding. Keeping food containers, newspapers or anything else they place value on is a common trait of survivors. This is because they worry about not having things they need and because of their experience of having possessions taken away from them in the past.
They may also pass on survival messages to their children, given to them by their own parents during a time when they needed to be wary of people in uniform, for example, to protect themselves and stay safe. It has caused hypervigilance in some of the clients I have seen, always making them on alert.
Whatever issues my clients are facing, we work on their symptoms and devise coping strategies. I set goals on what they would like to work towards and support them to achieve them. It’s about breaking things down to make them easier to do. With some clients, I help them to create a self-care toolbox, containing some of their favourite things. This may include a favourite book, piece of music, item of food, and a photo of a person they love or a holiday pic when they were enjoying themselves. The idea is that when they are feeling depressed, they can turn to the toolbox, which helps to ground them and take them to a better place.
The support offered through Jami, the mental health service for the Jewish community, is tailored to each individual. The fact that Jami is a Jewish charity is very important to many of them. A lot of second-generation survivors wouldn’t trust all non-communal organisations because there’s often a fear of persecution, of being targeted and of not being understood.
As a Jewish organisation, we are better able to relate to our clients. Although we can’t know what it feels like to be a Holocaust survivor, some of us may have, or know someone who has, family members who were survivors. This enables us to provide a greater degree of empathy through our increased understanding.
Related Topics

Information and support
When you’re living with a mental health problem, or supporting someone who is, having access to the right information - about a condition, treatment options, or practical issues - is vital. Visit our information pages to find out more.
Share your story with others
Blogs and stories can show that people with mental health problems are cared about, understood and listened to. We can use it to challenge the status quo and change attitudes.