My journey from silence to support
Aled, from Gwynedd, blogs about his journey with postnatal depression and how his recovery has led to him helping other dads.
Please take care when reading as this blog contains references to suicide.
Looking back, I realise that I’ve struggled with my mental health for most of my life. The signs were always there — the anger that I couldn’t explain, the self-harm I tried to hide, and the growing distance between me and the people who cared about me. I convinced myself I didn’t deserve love, that my family would be better off without me, and that I was destined to die alone.
In October 2021, six weeks after the birth of my youngest child, I tried to take my own life.
Even now, it’s difficult to write those words - but that moment changed everything.
Thankfully, I didn’t succeed. And in the weeks that followed, I began the hardest journey of my life: asking for help. With the love and support of my wife, my children, and a few close friends, I was able to reach out and finally get the help I needed. That’s when I was diagnosed with postnatal depression. It was something I didn’t even realise men could experience.
At first, I looked for somewhere I could go to talk openly about what I was going through - a space like an AA meeting, where men could sit together and share their experiences without fear or judgment. I wanted somewhere I could understand my thoughts, and not feel so alone. But there was nothing like that for dads.
That realisation could have broken me. But instead, it became my motivation.
Out of that moment of darkness, How’s Dad? Sut mae Dad? was born: a social enterprise dedicated to supporting fathers and raising awareness of men’s mental health, postnatal depression, and suicide prevention.
I wanted to create a space where dads could spend quality time with their children, build stronger bonds, and — just as importantly — talk honestly about how they’re feeling. A space where they didn’t have to pretend to be okay.
I am stronger than I thought. I am enough. And I have a purpose.
Too often, parenting is seen only through the lens of the mother. Fathers are expected to “man up”, hold it together, and carry on - even when they’re breaking inside. I wanted to change that.
Through How’s Dad? Sut mae Dad?, my aim is to give every father the chance to be seen, heard, and supported. To build a community where men can talk openly about their struggles, where help feels accessible, and where no one has to face their darkest moments alone. I’ve even been told that through this initiative, I’ve saved lives. That means the world.
Right now, I’m working to grow How’s Dad? Sut mae Dad? across Anglesey, Gwynedd, and one day across Wales — bridging the gap in mental health services for fathers.
Before my breakdown, I couldn’t picture a future with me in it.
But my struggles, and even my suicide attempt, taught me something vital:
I am stronger than I thought. I am enough. And I have a purpose.
If you’re reading this and you’re struggling, please know this: you’re not alone. Reach out. Talk. There is help, there is hope, and there is a tomorrow.
I’m Aled - and I’m proud of the man I’ve become.
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