Openmind 120, March/April 2003
I was at the theaatre with a friend. The fuzzy feeling in my head and my slightly sore throat weren't detracting from my enjoyment of the play. It was only when the stage props lurched to and fro that I became alarmed. Panic swiftly accompanied my dizziness: feelings of being unable to breathe properly, nausea, heart racing. 'Excuse me,' I said, stumbling over handbags as I made my way along the row, then up the steps to the exit at the back. ....
'Panic attacks,'the GP announced. And the reason for his confidence in swiftly reaching this diagnosis? As a depressed teenager I'd had voluntary psychiatric treatment. But that was 30 years ago. I'd mentioned it in response to his initial questioning about whether I'd ever before experienced dizziness, fainting, anxiety or depression. He said that this past depression was relevant, especially as it had required hospitalisation, heavy drugs and ECT. Actually my condition had not 'required' hospitalisation, heavy drugs and ECT, although I had naively complied. What happened to me all those years ago as a psychiatric patient should never have occurred....
He reached for his prescription pad and said he was going to put me on an antidepressant. 'But I'm not depressed,' I pointed out. 'It will also reduce anxiety and stop the panic attacks.' 'No thank you,' I said, standing up. Tranquillisers and antidepressants were, in any case, out of the question for me. Life had been good since I managed to withdraw from them in 1973. 'Okay,' he said. 'There is another way. Seeing as you're so against these, I'll put you on a different kind of drug. A beta blocker. That will stop the panic attacks.' 'No,' I said again.
I could accept that panic attacks were one possible explanation of my recent experiences. But shouldn't he have been considering other possibilities too? Wouldn't a physical investigation be needed? I found out later that other survivors of the psychiatric system have had similar experiences when consulting their GP about various medical problems. I also learnt later that research by E. Hoeper et al (1984, 'The usefulness of screening for mental illness', The Lancet 1: 33-5) suggests the tendency of GPs to diagnose what could be physical illnesses on the basis of a patient's previous mental illness diagnosis. I left the surgery feeling disturbed. The GP's attitude had taken me back in time to the vulnerable teenager who had accepted inappropriate and damaging treatment, based on no knowledge of her needs and circumstances. ...
The next day I fell ill with a flu-type virus, which incapacitated me for about a week. Since recovering from that, I've had no more 'panic attacks'. I'm enjoying life to the full again. I found that several people I work with were off sick with the same symptoms. I chatted about it with one of my colleagues, a psychiatrist, on her return to work. Like mine, her flu-type illness had been preceded with a few days of grogginess, a slight sore throat and dizzy spells. Like mine, her dizzy spells had been quite frightening and she had visited her GP. And when my colleague, presumably with no 'past history' as a psychiatric patient, presented to her GP with the same symptoms as I'd had, were her dizzy spells diagnosed as 'panic attacks'? Did her GP promptly reach for his prescription pad to prescribe antidepressants, tranquillisers or beta blockers? Of course not.